Wednesday, February 3, 2010

WMA's

It is again award season in Hollywood and I'm constantly hearing about the Grammy's, the Tony's, the Oscars, the SAG awards, so on and so forth. Why, I ask, are there no WMA's? What is this fabulous award you ask? Well let me tell you! It's the Wife and Mother Awards! This brilliant idea came to me just last night as I was applauded by my family for serving a dinner that everybody liked (practically unheard of at our house, which is why I felt I was receiving an award).

I had a vision of stepping onstage to accept my trophy (a miniature golden vacuum cleaner of course!), and with tears in my eyes, making my acceptance speech:

"I would just like to thank all of the little people, literally, the little people, for allowing me to make dinner for you every night! Without you, I would have no purpose. It is such a privilege and honor to slave over a hot stove for each of you and finally stumble across a recipe that you deem worthy of repeating. And to my husband, what can I say?....you are the light in my refrigerator, without you....all would be dark....Thank you, thank you very much!"

As I'm walking back down the red carpet the reporters are asking me about what I'm wearing (sweats and t-shirt by Target, shoes by Walmart), my hairstyle (I call it fashionably dissheveled, ala Meg Ryan) and my date (no date, they're all in front of the TV).

Although it is unlikely this award will ever come into existence, just thinking about it does make it a little easier to compete with Martha Stewart and Rachel Ray every day...... :)

2 comments:

  1. Love it! You are so clever and funny =)

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  2. Ha! RR and The Witch (Aka martha) have nothing on you! they have gads a staff people to make sure every jar of spices and bow are in perfect order...you...you do it all by yourself, and laugh about it, too! As far as I'm concerned you should get a WMA everyday!

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